


Expensive Protection

by haeym



Category: DBSK | Tohoshinki | TVfXQ | TVXQ
Genre: Anniversary, Awkward gifts, Condoms, Dirty Talk, Humor, M/M, Party
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-12-18
Updated: 2012-12-18
Packaged: 2018-08-27 19:04:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,086
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8413069
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/haeym/pseuds/haeym
Summary: "A hand grabs his shoulder and pries open his curled posture. Changmin clutches the box against his chest, maybe pressing hard enough will make it invisible. Yunho stares at him, smile slowly dying on his plump lips. Then his expression gets worried and Changmin knows exactly what he's thinking and answers before he can make Yunho freak you."





	

On TVXQ's 9th anniversary, they receive a present from Zhou Mi which makes Changmin all fierce and Yunho all amused.

 _Louis Vuitton_ condoms.

Changmin's expression is priceless. He's gaping like a fish, mouth twisted into something that one would maybe call surprise or maybe disbelief or what Yunho would just call the _Judging Dongsaeng_ face. It's absolutely hilarious and as Zhou Mi smiles his beaming smile and holds out the present to drop it in Changmin hands – which he does – Changmin's face has heated up quite nicely, blush creeping as high as the tips of his ears.

He can't even remember what the tall gentleman says. Too dumbfounded to do anything else, he stares at the present he just received, mouth still open and he tries to stutter something back. He's not even sure who he's talking to or what he is even trying to say but what comes out sounds a lot like a shaky thank you, nicely spiced up with anger.

Controlled anger, yes, Changmin is sophisticated.

And here comes Yunho, sunshine smile on his lips and eyes glimmering in the party lights. Changmin groans and tries to turn away before Yunho can see they have received a present but the leader is faster and calls out to him.

‘Changminnie, what did we get?’

Changmin slumps his shoulders over his hands, trying to hide what he has. He thanks whichever god is willing to listen to his prayers that Kyuhyun has company and isn't picking on him at the moment. Sometimes parties with lots of guests are great. Especially if you have just received condoms as a present. Louis Vuitton condoms.

A hand grabs his shoulder and pries open his curled posture. Changmin clutches the box against his chest, maybe pressing hard enough will make it invisible. Yunho stares at him, smile slowly dying on his plump lips. Then his expression gets worried and Changmin knows exactly what he's thinking and answers before he can make Yunho freak you.

'I'm okay. Totally okay, feeling fine. It's just...'

The words die on his tongue. He just stares at Yunho’s collarbones in front of him as the older man has a death grip on his arm, not buying Changmin’s explanation. Yunho looks like he is ready to hold Changmin up if he suddenly faints. As if that would ever happen but he is Yunho after all.

A blush creeps back on Changmin's face. How is he going to explain Yunho that they just received condoms. As an anniversary present. And not just some random condoms. Louis Vuitton condoms. He's about to say something general and vague about the party but what his mouth decides to splutter out is exactly what he wasn’t going to say.

‘This box holds Louis Vuitton condoms worth over 70,000 won each.’

Yunho looks at him with a dumbfounded expression. Maybe Changmin is not that screwed after all.

‘Excuse me?’ Yunho counters him.

‘And there are ten of them. _Ten Louis Vuitton condoms._ In this box. 70,000 won each. _Over 700,000 won overall._ ’

Yunho squints his eyes a little, still looking confused.

‘We got. Louis Vuitton condoms. From Mi,’ anger reddens Changmin's face as he whispers out, voice strained and the situation making him extremely embarrassed. It's about Louis Vuitton condoms after all.

They are standing close to each other, Changmin looking pained and leaning towards Yunho who is holding his arm, pose a bit haphazard until enlightenment spreads through his face and he laughs. He laughs loud, that typical stupid laughter of his and Changmin can feel how his anger turns into embarrassment. Or more like fuels it. If his face isn't permanently red after this, he's not sure who he should be thanking.

When Yunho catches his breath and stops shaking with the fits of laughter, Changmin is staring at him intensely. No one is paying any particular attention to them so he's sure they are safe. So far. This is about Louis Vuitton condoms after all.

‘Have you told everyone?’ Changmin hisses.

‘Told about what?’ Yunho looks a bit baffled.

‘About. You know. Us.’

‘No, but I think it's quite obvious?’ Yunho stammers a little with his answer but then continues, mischief sparkling in his eyes. ‘Do you really think they haven't noticed? The way you sing along with my solos, the affectionate looks you give me and the increased skinsh-”

Changmin snarls and whispers through closed teeth,

‘I do NOT do any of that.’

‘I have heard that the fans think, or in this case know... or have guessed, that we are a couple. As if it were a secret to our friends.’

Yunho's mischief has turned into his normal sunshine beam and he takes a hold of Changmin's hands around the box. Anguish bleeds into the Changmin’s expression. He has sunk into the deepest pit of despair before Yunho continues,

‘And haven't you told your best buddy Kyuhyun?’

His tone is teasing.

'I remember you explaining how you told him – under the influence of alcohol as far as I can remember – that you absolutely loved how I had rammed into you last night after the Inkigayo filming and-'

How can someone look so fucking innocent when they talk about sex. About dirty sex. Changmin stares at the floor, the box still in his hands. Yunho removes his hands. Changmin stares at the floor. They just received condoms as an anniversary present. Louis Vuitton condoms.

Okay, maybe life isn't so harsh. They were running out of normal ones after all. So they are now going to use these, ridiculously expensive designer condoms for a while. Whatever.

Not for long though, if Changmin gets to decide. Maybe for a few days or so.

He slaps himself mentally.

Someone calls for Yunho and the older turns to shout a reply, something along the lines about him being back there soon. Before that though, he leans forward for a whisper, tone lit up with that familiar, dangerous spark, hot breath ghosting over the shell of Changmin's ear.

'I bet you'd enjoy me fucking you while wearing one, am I right? Think about it. Basically over 70,000 won stuffed inside you with my dick. Besides, you're the fashionista here.'

And with that, Yunho is gone and arousal churns in Changmin's stomach as he wails angrily after Yunho.

* * *

The next morning Changmin calls Kyuhyun and tells how much fucking better the Louis Vuitton condoms are compared to the normal ones. Even if they cost over 70,000 won each.

**Author's Note:**

> 70,000won is around 68$. And yes, they do exist.
> 
> This fic was originally posted on 18/12/2012 on Livejournal.  
> This version of it has been edited for AO3 in 2016.


End file.
